It's the first time in my life I don't know what to do.
I've always gone after what I wanted. When I lock my sights on something, even the seemingly impossible, nothing stops me from getting it. If I ever found myself in front of a closed door, I would knock at first to give them a fighting chance before breaking it down completely. I am all or nothing.
She’s gone and I let her go. I know I had the power within me to stop her, but I didn't. If anything happens to her, I know it is on me.
When it comes to my Mate I don't feel in control. I have never felt like this before, she feels part of me in a way I cannot describe.
Call it survival instinct. Call it self-preservation. But if I started talking I don't know if I would stop. If I reached out and grabbed her I wouldn't be able to stop myself from mapping every part of her body.
So to stay in control I say nothing. I do nothing.
Now I have to live with the consequences of my actions. I watch as she disappears into the crowd without looking back and I know I am paying the price for my hesitation.
Now it's all to play for. Nothing is certain anymore. The only certainty I know is that she and I have an appointment dictated by divine timing and free will alone will determine the outcome.
If the Natural Laws of Sensio include second chances, I will grab it and her with both hands and never let her go again. She is mine. She is my Mate. And I will love her until my last breath leaves my body.
“She visits in dreams but never when called,
I feel I know her, yet bond not formed,
How will I know if the Heaven’s align?
Perhaps when my heart is no longer mine”